Still

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Still

Reasoning gone
I sit in my terror
crushing problems
suffocating me.

I sit still.

Too tired to try
I sit in this dump
it’s never enough
always my fault.

Still, I sit.

Everything ruined
I sit enraged
anger unhinged
I want to break it!

I sit still.

I’m so dumb
I sit in my filth
steeped in hate
deep in my dread-

still.

© Rebecca Sanchez 2013

Even though I wrote this in 2013 it applies to today. This world is shocking us more every day as these historical times beat us down. It’s easy to feel there is nowhere to turn and no goodness left. With a president like Trump, the people are divided and fearful. To be fair, Trump didn’t start the problems we have but him getting elected just proved to me (once again) that our system doesn’t work. In my lifetime of voting, I have never been happy with the results. Even if the people I voted for got elected they never got anything done. Promises are always broken and I pay for more today than ever. Being a woman, I make less than men and am expected to ignore that fact and carry on. WTF!???  We are the only country that doesn’t have a healthcare system for everyone. People don’t get to keep their teeth or see clearly because these aren’t always covered under insurance. That is insane! We are overbuilding on land we shouldn’t be building on in the first place (maybe we wouldn’t have so many floods) and none of the new housing is for the middle-class or poor. Endangered animals can be killed because we need the land. Most of the problems we are having in this country are due to our horrible, greedy, rich government officials who get fatter pork bellies daily by screwing the majority of its citizens. Republicans have the majority and what has happened? Nothing! They don’t want to do their highly paid jobs. I think we should get rid of this system and the deadbeats in it and rebuild our government for the real good of the people. Get rid of them and we may have a chance to do some really great things in America.

Let’s stop pointing fingers and fighting each other. Aren’t we over color and race in 2017? Bullying other people and feeling superior to them? This petty shit has got to stop we are ALL getting screwed. We need to come together as Americans and protest TOGETHER. This is how they keep us knuckled under!! This is why the terrorists can get to us so easily. Of course, what do I know?

Written for the prompt “howl your poetry into my bones” with my friends at the Imaginary Garden Of Real Toads.

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Tanka #41215 (The Fishwife)

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tanka #41215 (The Fishwife)

feeling queasy now
butterflies-out of the way
it’s not so easy
I have a belly of fish
that never stop swimming

© Rebecca Sanchez 2015

Linking up an old poem with dVerse~Poets Pub that I wrote for this prompt which I animated.

Background: I had a very interesting word trip when I started this poem and I had to share it with you. When seeing this picture prompt I thought, I’ll write a poem about a woman with fish in her belly or fishbelly. Then I looked it up.

Besides the Jonah in the belly of the whale story, the white skin under a bathing suit line and normal fish bellies, I found this urban definition (2006), fishbelly: a bad name for a white caucasian person. Then I asked for other words and it gave me 20 related to fishbelly.

Honky, bad, caucasian, clit, clitoris, cracka, cracker, craka, fish, fish belly, fishbelly pussy, girl, puberty, pubic, twat, vag vagina, white, whitey, wonderbread. Wow!

If you caught the date, this word was re-defined in 2006. Now fast forward to now with Trump as president. Meanings like this aren’t going anywhere soon.

Lust/Love Sonnet

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Lust/Love Sonnet

I still love you after the fevered flesh has cooled
after the earth-shattering build to the summit
I’m oblivious to all else when in my frenzy
but the two of us, between sheets sublime.

I love the delirious delicious decadence of our intimacy
goosebumps on my skin when you touch me
I am certain no one will ever love me this much
then I watch my lover leave a stranger.

I love you like a dog loves to get scratched where it can’t reach
tongue exposed, slobbering and exposing myself
whimpering for more when you stop.

We never talk about our lives outside of the hotel room
rose-colored glasses are what I choose to wear
living in an altered sense of consciousness as lovers, not friends.

© Rebecca Sanchez 2017

The artwork is mine from a photograph taken while riding my bike put through a filter and animated.

For dVerse~Poets Pub, we were told to write a free verse sonnet. I am used to rhyming so I hope this will do. This is about a man I once thought I’d spend some time with but great sex does not a relationship, make.

The Flood

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The Flood

She hiked through the backwoods
alone in her toxic thoughts
again, her life was filled with emptiness
love had passed her by.

Her teardrops like a downpour
storming down her face
trepidation in her footsteps
she felt vulnerable and used up
she was damaged goods.

She didn’t deserve to be treated like this
it wasn’t the first time
numb to the outside world
a trickle of anger broke through
now weeping profusely
the flood broke loose.

She didn’t notice until the damage was done
she had cried a river of tears
and by losing herself
it easily
^^^^^^^^^^^^swept
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^her
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^away.

© Rebecca Sanchez 2017

Written for the prompt “flood” with my friends at Poets United. I animated the artwork which I used as part of the prompt.

One Tear

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One Tear

Once the pain has been dealt
once the sadness is felt
once your life comes undone
once the tears have begun
once the going gets tough
can one tear be enough?

© Rebecca Sanchez 2017

An image prompt from Positively Prompted on Google Plus. I wrote about and animated this image. Shared with the Imaginary Garden Of Real Toads.

The Reveal

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The Reveal

Don’t look now-

I’m invisible!

I know you can see me
but I have made myself very small
I’m hardly here at all.

Look at me now-

I only reveal what is there!

Whatever it is
it can’t affect me
you will see.

Don’t look now-

I’m a freak!

I can only hope to hide
I can’t conform
I will never be the norm.

© Rebecca Sanchez 2015

Shared with my friends at dVerse~Poets Pub. My artwork and a poem from the past.

Pharmaceuticals

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Pharmaceuticals

A pill a pill to kill my ills
a magic potion just for me
once a day to make me chill
I take my tablets happily.

A pill a pill to kill my ills
a capsule for my aches and pains
my doctor has a special pill
for every sickness that I feign.

A pill a pill to kill my ills
a gel cap for my troubled brain
pills that rob me of my will
but next week I will still complain.

© Rebecca Sanchez 2014

Our society has a pill for almost everything we can think of and a horrible problem with addiction. Sometimes the drug is worse than the illness and fills an emotional need rather than physical. Addiction hurts not only you but the people around you and impacts your life in a negative way. Just because they are easy to get doesn’t mean it’s ok to take them. Be strong!